Commit

As an adult we commit to so many activities, obligations and even people. We commit our money, our time and even possessions. The hardest to commit is our hearts. It the first place we protect and hide when there's love, tragedy or sadness. The heart keeps us alive, and not just physically. Its the pumping station to refuel yourself with what makes you happy, energized, and fulfilled.

Hubby and I have committed our hearts to adopting a baby!

In May, we looked over all the different adoption agencies that we visited and contacted since August 2014. It was time to look through a open door rather than pry open a closed door. We knew it was a good decision to hold off on using a donor six months prior. The road became clear.

We often referred to adoption as plan C. It is not our last resort- going without a family is our last resort. We called it plan C because it was a plan that required Caution. Caution for both families involved. It was not a process that Hubby and I can do secretly. It requires the love, respect and acknowledgement of another woman, another family. It requires lots of time and money and the whole process lacks discretion. Creating a family is suppose to be sacred and discreet between husband and wife. It has now involved more than 5 doctors, all of our family, friends, church members and more people than I can count. A whole village knows! It is not an easy pill to swallow.

However our hearts are totally exposed and totally committed. We feel confident in the decisions that we have made during this 5 year struggle. It is one that we will not keep secret from our children either. I strongly believe in equipping children (as appropriate age) with the tools they need to live a fulfilling life. My parents and others equipped us well. One of my friends told me "You will be a lucky mom to skip the part that we all hate, labor!" She was focused on the labor part and I was focused on the mom part. Committing my heart to adopting a child will allow for me to be what I have worked so hard for, to be a Mother.

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